Manitou Incline: A Flatlander’s Epic Battle with Altitude

As someone who thrives at a nice, sea-level altitude, I decided to take on the Manitou Incline—because why not challenge yourself with 2,700+ steps straight into the sky? Some call it a hike. I call it a vertical battlefield.

For those unfamiliar, the Incline is a one-mile trail, but instead of a nice, leisurely stroll, it’s essentially a staircase built by mountain-loving overachievers who thought “let’s make people climb until they question their life choices.” And, of course, I was up for the challenge.

Step One: Pure Confidence

I showed up ready. Hydrated? Check. Stretched? Check. Mentally prepared? Absolutely. As I looked up at the towering staircase of doom, I thought, Okay, this is steep, but I’ve got legs of steel. Let’s go.

Locals zipped past me like they were on an escalator, while I maintained a steady, calculated pace—because this wasn’t just about speed, it was about strategy. I knew the altitude would try to play games with me, but I was determined to win.

Step Two: The Oxygen Situation

Now, let’s talk about altitude. I’m used to air that actually has oxygen in it, but at 7,000+ feet, my lungs had to work a little harder. Did I slow down? Maybe for a second. But did I let it stop me? Absolutely not.

I embraced the challenge like a seasoned warrior. When my lungs said, “Hey, this is new,” I replied, “Yes, but we adapt.” When my legs burned, I told them, “Suck it up; we’ve got a mountain to conquer.”

Step Three: The Fake Summit Betrayal

At one point, I looked up and saw what I thought was the top. Victory was near! The sweet taste of success filled my soul. But as I reached this so-called summit, I realized… it was a decoy.

Oh, you thought you were done? Plot twist. There were more steps waiting, laughing in my face. But did I let it break me? Nope. I adjusted my stance, took a deep breath, and powered on.

Step Four: Conquering the Beast

As I neared the actual summit, I was in the zone. Nothing could stop me. Each step was a testament to determination. I reached the top and stood there, victorious, taking in the incredible view like a true champion.

Other hikers were high-fiving, taking selfies, and snacking like they just finished a light jog. I joined in, because, let’s be real—this was a moment worth celebrating.

Step Five: The Descent (A Different Kind of Challenge)

Going up was tough, but going down? That was an entirely different battle. With legs of steel but knees of caution, I made my way down like a pro—controlled, steady, and not at all like a newborn deer. (Okay, maybe just a little.)

Final Thoughts

Would I do it again? Absolutely. Manitou Incline is not for the faint of heart, but it’s a challenge worth taking. If you’re a flatlander considering this trek, just remember:

• Altitude is real. Respect it.
• Pace yourself. This is a marathon, not a sprint.
• The fake summit is a lie. Trust nothing.
• The view at the top is 100% worth it.

So, did I conquer the Manitou Incline? Yes. And would I do it again? Bring it on.